Dear Sinéad, Siouxsie and Thomas:
My mother moved in with me a year and a half ago after a stroke. My cat sometimes likes to sleep on the dresser in Mom's room and occasionally on the foot of her bed (which Mom doesn't really like but tolerates).

As Mom began to use her 4-point cane to walk from room to room, the cat began to walk with her, sometimes weaving in and out between her legs, and often flops down in front of Mom with body, legs and tail spread out. I move her out of the way by pushing her gently with my foot. The cat will rise, walk beside Mother for a few feet, down flop down again in front of her. If the cat is in the house when Mother walks, the cat walks with her. The cat often walks with me but never gets in my way.

The cat has never threatened Mother and has jumped up into her lap a few times but gets down when Mother says, "No, get down." None of the cat's activities are quick or menacing, but are slower with no discernible reaction to being physically moved. She is a very easygoing cat.

Any ideas on the flopping down in front of my mother?

Mother never liked cats but is tolerating mine very, very well. Mother wonders aloud if the cat is angry for taking my attention. I would like to be able to reassure my mother that the cat does not see her as an intruder.

Thank you,
Sharon

Sinéad: Well, Sharon, Siouxsie and Thomas and I have discussed your question, and we've come to the conclusion that your cat is not actually reacting to your mother as an intruder, but that she wants to welcome your mother into "her" home.

Siouxsie: Many cat lovers have observed that cats seem to gravitate toward people who are allergic to or don't care for cats. There's a good reason for this: These people don't smell like other cats -- after all, they avoid cats -- so they're free for the marking!

Thomas: So we think that the first part of your puzzle is that your cat just wants to let your mother know that she is welcome to be part of her territory and family.

Sinéad: The flopping down behavior you describe is a form of attention seeking. Many cats who want the attention of people will make sure they get themselves in a position where they can't possibly be ignored. I tend to do this by walking in between Mama and her book or computer screen .... just like I'm doing right noww28y3eeurhlu...

JaneA: Sinéad, how can I possibvlfenda;eu ... possibly type your column if you insist owehir;n ... on walking in front of my ffewugtyrgbgk .... my face?

Sinéad: Sorry, Mama. Let me just get comfortable ..... Okay, you may continue typing now.

JaneA: *mrphfft!* I still can't see!

Sinéad: Fine, then. I'll move. For now.

Siouxsie: The point is, your kitty is trying to make sure your mother sees her and pays attention to her. She has apparently grasped that she needs to avoid tripping your mother or moving so quickly that she causes your mom to fall.

Thomas: Your cat just wants to be loved. She doesn't understand that there are people who don't care for cats. Frankly, we don't understand this, either, because we cats are such wonderful, miraculous, intelligent and beautiful creatures that we can't believe anyone could dislike us.

Sinéad: There is probably another, more subtle, element to your cat's behavior, Sharon. Many people believe that cats have a way of helping people heal from illness and injury, and we believe your cat wants to help your mother.

Siouxsie: When she gets in your mother's lap, she may want to do "therapy cat" work. Many of us love to feel that we're doing something beneficial for our human companions, and we have some natural talents that can help you.

Thomas: Many scientific studies have revealed that petting an animal (whether that animal is a cat or a dog) reduces blood pressure in humans, and that having a loving relationship with an animal can reduce stress and depression as well. This is one reason why many long-term care facilities will bring in humans and their therapy animals, or possibly have a few cats that live there and "visit" with the residents.

Sinéad: Other, less scientific but still (in our humble opinions) valid, data suggest that the cat's purr vibrates at a frequency that stimulates the body's energy field to promote healing. This article discusses the concept of the cat's purr as a healing sound. We've given lots of "purr therapy" to our mama over the years, and she knows it works.

Siouxsie: If you're interested in reading about how cats and other animals have helped their humans to heal and learn valuable life lessons, you may enjoy reading Animals as Teachers and Healers by Susan Chernak McElroy.

Thomas: McElroy, herself a cancer survivor, tells her story and relates other people's inspirational stories about how animals have helped their humans recover from an array of physical or emotional problems, and how these animals have taught them what's truly meaningful.

Sinéad: Unlike some books of this nature, this one does not have a bias toward a particular religious path, so Christians, pagans, new-agers, old-agers or whatever will not find their spiritual sensibilities offended.

Siouxsie: The Angel Animals Network, started by another author who collected stories about the spiritual connections between people and animals, has more stories along this line, too.

Thomas: So, Sharon, we don't think your cat is mad at your mother. We think she wants to welcome your mother and help her to heal and recover from her stroke. She wants your mother to love her.

Sinéad: Even if your mother can't find her way clear to love your cat the way you do, maybe over time she will grow to accept that your cat loves her, no matter how she feels about the subject.

Siouxsie: We hope this helps you and your mother, Sharon. Good luck, and purrs to all of you.

Got a question? Need some advice? E-mail us at advice@paws-and-effect.com. None of the material in this column is meant to be a substitute for regular veterinary care.