Dear Sinéad, Siouxsie and Thomas:
I am in desperate need of help. My cat, Mia, is my best friend; at 3 years old, she's seen me through the end of an unhappy marriage and a messy divorce and my now-happy single life, I've had her since she was 5 weeks old ... but met her when she was a day old. I adopted her from a friend/volunteer for the Humane Society.

When Mia, who is a patchy calico and looks like she was sewn together with spare parts, was a kitten she was very social and fine with people. But when she was about 4-5 months old, she started hissing and growling at guests. This has progressed to the point that she hates everyone but me, and everyone thinks she is a psycho cat (a la Cujo). She will actually aggressively chase, hiss, swipe, and bite anyone who shows her the slightest bit of attention -- many times, totally unprovoked. Sometimes she just sits close by someone and stares at them with crazy eyes to intimidate them. There are two friends that come around frequently that she is a little better with; she actually will act like she likes them, and will let them pet her and sometimes purrs, but will turn on them and bite them for no reason. Not every time, just unpredictably. I'm always nervous when people come over (and they are too) because she is so unpredictable.

She is 100% loving, affectionate, passive, social, adorable to me. She has never hissed at me or shown even a glimmer of any of the bad behavior she exhibits around everyone else.

I'm afraid that I would have to give her away if I got married and/or had a child in the future. This would completely break my heart. But even if I would agree to that (I wouldn't), who would take her? She is psycho with everyone else. Help!

~K.

PS - Some other pertinent info: She is fixed and I have one other cat who she adores and is even submissive to.

Sinéad: K, it sounds to us like you're dealing with a cat who has been seriously traumatized. We don't think your cat hates people, we think she's terrified of them.

Siouxsie: That's right. There are a few clues in what you've told us. First of all, you said that she started hissing and growling at guests when she was 4-5 months old. That tells us that something may have happened to her around that time which made her frightened of guests.

Thomas: Another clue is that you mention that you had an unhappy marriage followed by a messy divorce. Cats can and do get stressed out and traumatized by these things, particularly if your marriage involved physical or emotional violence (verbal abuse, yelling). We wonder if that 4-5 month window in your kitty's life was when your realized you had to leave your marriage, or maybe when you or your husband moved out ... or some other major change along those lines.

Sinéad: Cats can develop a sort of post-traumatic stress syndrome, which often does include aggressiveness or fearfulness.

Siouxsie: The good news is that, like post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in humans, this condition can be treated. It's going to take patience and extra effort on your part, but it sounds like you're willing to do whatever you can to help Mia recover.

Thomas: The first thing you need to do is to think back to when Mia's problem behavior started and see if you can determine anything that might have triggered her fear or aggression.

Sinéad: If you can't think of a particular incident, that's okay. The next thing to do is observe when Mia's aggression happens. I know the attacks seem unprovoked, and it's virtually certain that nobody's consciously trying to hurt or scare your cat. But PTSD reactions aren't necessarily logical or rational on the surface; usually they are "triggered" when something about a situation or a person's behavior reminds the traumatized animal -- on a purely reptile-brain level -- of the trauma they suffered. As a result, the animal lashes out in order to protect themselves from the perceived threat.

Siouxsie: So, is there anything even remotely similar about the circumstances when Mia lashes out? Are people's voices raised? Is there a type of movement that happens before Mia becomes aggressive? Is there a familiar odor or background noise (does one of your guests wear a cologne or use a shampoo or soap your ex might have used, for example)?

Thomas: The next thing to determine is whether Mia's behavior is fear-based or more of a "straight on" aggression. A cat displaying fear aggression will be crouched low; her pupils will be dilated (maybe this is what you mean by "crazy eyes"), and her ears will be flat and pointed toward the back. Often a fearful cat will hiss and growl. Her body will face sideways, and her head and shoulders will be facing the object of her fear, as if her hind end is ready to run away but her front end is ready to attack.

Sinéad: When a cat is aggressive for other reasons, such as because of territorial battles, her pupils will be constricted (small), her eyes squinted, and her ears will be flat-sideways. Her whole body will face her attacker, and she's more likely to be standing rather than crouching.

Siouxsie: We're pretty sure you'll see from this description that Mia's aggression arises from fear. And the way to relieve fear-based aggression is to work on desensitizing her to the object of her fear.

Thomas: At this point, we think you and Mia need some professional help to solve Mia's aggression and fear problem. Mia's behavior is deeply embedded in her personality at this point, and it sounds as though it has gotten more severe over the years.

Sinéad: We recommend that you talk to your vet. He or she may be able to help you locate an animal behaviorist, a specialist who has the skills and training needed to help you help Mia recover from her fear.

Siouxsie: In a perfect world, your vet or this behaviorist might also be able to enlist the aid of a holistic practitioner. Homeopathy, for example, has had very good results in treating behavior problems in animals. Other forms of therapy such as Tellington TTouch and flower essences have worked very well in healing emotionally traumatized animals. If you can locate a holistic practitioner in any of these disciplines, they will be able to give you some other options for treatment, too.

Thomas: Ultimately, the treatment for Mia's aggression is going to be based on desensitization. That is, through the use of behavioral treatment and possibly medication, Mia will learn to feel less scared of the things that trigger her aggression. As she learns that she is safe and that she need not fear people (or the stimuli they bring), her aggression will decrease.

Sinéad: You probably noticed that Thomas mentioned medication. While we aren't huge advocates of using drugs to treat every problem, there are times when drug therapy can really help. In Mia's case, your vet or the behavioral specialist might recommend a temporary regimen of antidepressant or anti-anxiety drugs to help in the early stages of her treatment.

Siouxsie: The SSRI antidepressants (Prozac and others) have been successfully used "off label" (that is, they were created to treat human mental health problems, but they may not be specifically approved for use in animals) to treat aggression and anxiety in some cats and dogs. A few human anti-anxiety medications have been used in similar ways.

Thomas: Here we must state the obvious: If you have access to these medications for your own use, do not use them on your cat without the prescription and guidance of a veterinarian! These medications are dosed for humans, and you humans are so much bigger than cats that if you use a human-sized dose of any medication on a cat, you could cause grave illness or even death. Only a veterinarian can give you the right information about how to use any pharmaceutical drug safely on your cat.

Sinéad: Other desensitization techniques will probably include exposure to potentially traumatic stimuli at a safe distance, in a circumstance that allows Mia to feel like she has control over how she handles the stimuli.

Siouxsie: Here's something you can do in the meantime, while you're arranging a consultation with a behaviorist, to help Mia feel less fearful of guests.

Thomas: You mentioned you have a couple of friends Mia seems to tolerate. Perhaps you can enlist their aid in helping you to help Mia.

Sinéad: This is based on a trick Pamela Johnson-Bennett discusses in her book Think Like A Cat as a way to help fearful cats. What you do is invite one of these friends over for a visit. If Mia runs away as soon as the doorbell rings, then have your friend sit in the living room while you take an interactive toy (something on a string, preferably, like the Cat Dancer) and casually play with it in the room where Mia has gone to ground. Don't try to coax her out, just lightly play with the toy.

Siouxsie: If Mia doesn't run and hide, or if she decides to make an entrance after you and your friend have settled in, do the same thing: gently play with a toy on a string while you and your friend have a talk and a cup of tea. Make sure that whether you're playing in the same room with your guest or not, that both of you keep your voices low and calm, and that you not make any sudden movements.

Thomas: What you're trying to do with this trick is to reassure Mia that it's really no big deal to have guests over. By showing Mia that you feel safe enough to play with her while there's someone else in the house, you're showing Mia that she doesn't need to be scared, either.

Sinéad: The other thing that playing will do is help Mia take the adrenaline pumping through her body and channel it in a way that doesn't hurt people. She will feel better after a play session, and she'll probably curl up and go to sleep.

Siouxsie: Make sure that your guest is willing to leave at the first sign that Mia is becoming uncomfortable and may be gearing up for an aggressive reaction. This may mean that your friend visits for five minutes one day and an hour the next. If you can do this "visit with a friend and play with Mia" activity a couple of times a week, that should be fine.

Thomas: Make sure to give Mia a treat after your friend leaves. The association of play (fun) and a treat (yummy) with a guest's visit will help Mia to see that guests are not dangerous to her and will begin to desensitize her to whatever had traumatized her. There are lots of great treats on the market; we personally love Kookamunga Cat Treats and Feline Greenies.

Siouxsie: I don't like Feline Greenies. They taste like algae!

Thomas: Okay, so one of us doesn't like Feline Greenies. But Kookamunga Treats are a big hit here. Mama, can we have some Kookamunga Treats?

Siouxsie: Pleeeeeeeease?

Sinéad: Mama said we could have a treat later, after we're finished with the column.

Siouxsie: While you're in the process of working with Mia, it would probably be a good idea to have as little external stimuli as possible. If you can avoid having large parties at your house during the early stages of her treatment, for example, I'm sure Mia will thank you later.

Thomas: Well, K, we hope this helps you and Mia. Please let us know how things work out. Mama's rehabilitated a traumatized cat or two in her time, and she's got a special place in her heart for kitties who need some extra help in overcoming their fears.

Got a question? Need some advice? E-mail us at advice@paws-and-effect.com. None of the material in this column is meant to be a substitute for regular veterinary care.