Mama had hoped Miss Katrina’s behavior would improve after she got her little talking-to, but alas, that didn’t happen. Sure, Katrina tried to be on her best behavior, but then, well, she just couldn’t help herself and she’d start hissing and spitting and cussing!

Well, Mama realized that Katrina was just one of those cats that need to be an Only Cat. The poor thing was just as miserable being a family cat as we were having her as a guest. So Mama did the only thing that was fair to all of us: She called Doctor Sarah’s office and asked them if they could help her find a new home for our little refugee. A couple of weeks later, Katrina left with one of Doctor Sarah’s clients, a woman with a dog whose cat friend had died recently. The dog was grieving terribly, said the lady, and since Katrina got along well with dogs, she’d be a great fit in this family.

Needless to say, although we were very proud of Mama for doing her best to help a cat in need, we were all delighted when Katrina finally got to go to her new home.

Peace and quiet reigned, at last. I could walk through the center of the apartment without getting pounced on! Thomas and I could share Mama’s lap without that little Katrina butting in and shoving us aside.

Then, one day, a few weeks later, Mama said her usual goodbyes to us — “See you later, kitties; you be good!” — but this time she added something else. “I’m going to be back pretty late today,” she said. “I’m going to a Play Rehearsal.”

Now, I understood “play,” but I had no idea what this rehearsal thing was all about. Thomas tried to explain it to me, but I said, “Well, why can’t she play ‘rehearsal’ at home?”

Siouxsie sighed. “You silly kitten, don’t you listen at all? A play is a thing where a whole bunch of humans get together and talk to each other while others watch. And sometimes they even sing.”

“Why can’t they all get together and talk and sing here?” I asked.

“Apparently they need a thing called a Stage,” Thomas said. “And for some reason they have to read a book and remember what they’re supposed to say to each other and when. It’s all very weird, if you ask me.”

Well, now I was even more confused!

“Just sit tight and you’ll understand soon enough,” Siouxsie said.

I was so impressed that she didn’t growl at me that I almost ran over and snuggled next to her. But instead, I curled up in a sun puddle and gazed at the birds doing their early-spring mating dances.

But then the hours passed. And passed. And passed.

It was getting dark, and my stomach was starting to rumble.

“Where’s Mama?” I asked. “I’m hungry!”

“She told you: she was going to a play rehearsal,” Siouxsie grumbled.

“But I want my supper!”

“You’re just going to have to wait,” Thomas said.

“But Thoooooomm-maaaaaaassss!”

“Listen,” he snapped. “I’m just as hungry as you are, and I can’t do anything about it, either! Do I look like I have opposable thumbs? No! So I can’t open the door, I can’t use the can opener, and I can’t open the refrigerator!”

The refrigerator! That gave me an excellent idea.

Well, I wouldn't exactly refer to it as STEALING. Names have been removed to protect the owner of the clearly starving cat in this image.

I hopped off the cat condo and started sniffing at the edge of the door. I could smell what was inside, and it smelled super-yummy.

This refrigerator was smaller than the one they had at the Shelter, and it was apparently just the right size for a single mama who ate most of her meals at work or at the big house. The good thing about a small fridge, I reasoned, is that it’s probably a lot easier to get into.

I started poking the soft rubbery stuff between the door and the refrigerator itself until I found a place where I could wedge my nose in. I pushed my head forward as hard as I could until finally the door just popped right open!

“Yay!” I cried as I reached up for a plastic bag filled with cheese-smelling yumminess. “Nyom, nyom, nyom,” I grumbled with delight as I chewed a hole in it and started licking the delicious goods within.

Thomas came running over and pulled out a bag full of sliced roast beef, and Siouxsie decided she’d have the butter.

We nommed and chewed and licked to our heart’s delight, and then we pulled out a loaf of bread to cleanse our palates.

And now that our stomachs were nice and full, we could rest easy until Mama came back and fed us our regular dinner.

There was just one thing: Even though we did a really good job of taking the food out and eating it, we weren’t as effective at putting the food back and hiding the evidence of our starvation-induced snacking.

When Mama got home, she took one look at the mess on the floor and said, “Siooooouuux-sieeeeee….” She put all the stuff back in the fridge and told us that the fridge isn’t for kitties. I figured the fridge sure was for kitties, especially if they’d been cruelly starved because their person felt it was more important to play ‘rehearsal’ than to feed the cats!

See the rest of the story | Next chapter >

Dear Most Esteemed and Knowledgeable Kitties:

We took in a Siamese mix cat, Merryl, about 10 years ago, when he was six months old. About 5 years ago he started vomiting a white foamy substance. We took him to the vet, who ran a battery of tests — blood work, x-rays, you name it — that revealed nothing out of the ordinary. Back then Merryl, was doing this once or twice a week and would eat little or nothing for a day each time it happened. He would puke four or five times, just foamy clear/white liquid even if he just ate a meal. Sometimes loose hair would be mixed in, but I never saw a hairball. But in the past year, the problem has gotten worse. He’s now doing repeated vomiting episodes three or four times a week. About a day after an episode, he seems to feel better and eats like you wouldn’t believe; he’s fine for a day or two, and then the whole process repeats. We’ve taken him to several different vets looking for answers, with no luck. He is so skinny he almost looks unhealthy, but when he is eating he’s super-active and extremely loving. This has gone on so long it is obviously not something that’s very critcial to his health, but we would love to treat him! We have tried Science Diet foods, other dry foods, only canned moist foods — none of this seems to affect the issue at all. He had a couple of urinary tract infections, but the last one was two years before this vomiting issue surfaced. Otherwise, he has no problems other than this one repeating issue no vet can seem to figure out. Any ideas? We want to help him!

~ Alex

Siouxsie: Wow, Alex, we’re sorry that you and Merryl are going through this misery! We think we might have a few tips for you and possibilities to discuss with your veterinarian as well.

Thomas: First of all, there are all kinds of reasons why cats vomit, from hairballs to bad food to eating mildly poisonous plants.

Dahlia: In the Cat Owner’s Home Veterinary Handbook, the authors write that when a cat vomits and continues to retch, bringing up a clear, frothy fluid, that suggests spoiled food, grass, hairballs, eating indigestible objects, or diseases that irritate the stomach lining.

Siouxsie: Another common reason for vomiting is food sensitivity. Cats aren’t designed to eat high-carbohydrate foods, and many commercial pet foods are made with artificial preservatives, low-quality grains and low-quality proteins.

Thomas: You might try feeding Merryl a premium canned cat food, one that’s 95% protein or more, with a type of meat he doesn’t usually eat. I’m quite fond of the venison canned food Mama’s been getting for us, and it’s easier on my tender tummy than other types of meats.

Dahlia: Another thing you can do is try feeding him some baby food. Pureed chicken or beef baby food (read the label and make sure it does not contain garlic!) may be easy enough on his stomach that he could tolerate eating some even after one of his vomiting episodes.

Siouxsie: It’s not ideal food — it doesn’t have all the nutrients cats need — but it will give him some energy to recover and he may feel less miserable with something in his stomach.

Thomas: Has your cat had an ultrasound exam or an endoscopy? We ask because certain diseases that cause vomiting, such as pancreatitis and liver/gall bladder disease, can be detected by ultrasound. An endoscopic procedure can detect if Merryl has any abnormalities in his digestive tract, such as a stomach ulcer (cats do occasionally get them) or irritable bowel disease.

Dahlia: Because Merryl is so skinny, we’re concerned that he’s not able to absorb and utilize whatever nutrients he is getting, so it would be worth it to find out if there’s anything structurally wrong with his gastrointestinal system.

Siouxsie: Another question for you: How are Merryl’s bowel movements? Are they normal and solid, or does he have diarrhea or stools that are like cow manure in consistency? Be sure you report to your vet about what comes out the back of the kitty as well as what comes out the front.

Thomas: Different consistencies, colors, and smells of feces can help your vet get some idea of where in your kitty’s gastrointestinal tract the irritation is taking place.

Dahlia: If Merryl is vomiting because he’s nauseous, your vet may be able to give you a medicine to help combat the queasiness, which may make it easier for him to enjoy a good meal.

Siouxsie: And, of course, we can’t ignore the possibility that there’s something in Merryl’s environment that’s making him sick. When the problem started five years ago, had you changed anything in your home? For instance, did you have new carpet installed? Did you have your home or yard sprayed for bugs? Did you bring some new plants inside?

Thomas: Cats do like to chew on plants, and some of those plants can be toxic to cats. If you’re seeing plant matter in Merryl’s vomit, he may be eating your plants for reasons known only to him.

Dahlia: Here’s a comprehensive list of plants and household cleaners that are toxic to cats.

Siouxsie: We suggest you keep a journal of the foods Merryl is eating, any special activities going on (even including household chores like vacuuming and doing laundry), what kind of kitty litter you’re using, the consistency and frequency of his bowel movements and urination, and the times when he has vomiting episodes. You may find some common factors that can help you track down the sources of his problem.

Thomas: Good luck, Alex. I know how awful it feels to have a sensitive stomach and easily irritated guts, so I really sympathize with Merryl!

Dahlia: Please let us know what you find out and if any of the changes you make help the little guy feel better.

Dear Most Esteemed and Knowledgeable Kitties:

My kitty is 7 years old and weighs 32 pounds (14.5 kg). Recently he had some pain in his back leg. I took him to the vet, who thought he pulled a disc in his back or had a thrombus. Tests for both of these conditions were negative. The vet gave him pain medicine and sent him home. Now my cat acts like he doesn’t know us — and doesn’t even know his name! He doesn’t eat or drink much now, and it seems like he lost the will to live. What can I do to help him feel better? Please help my big kitty.

~ Amanda

Siouxsie: The first thing you need to do is call your vet. Your cat may be having a reaction to the pain medication he’s taking.

Thomas: Once you’ve got the medication issue straightened out, you’ll need to get to the core of your cat’s problem and the reason why he may have hurt himself: your cat is morbidly obese.

Dahlia: Unless your cat is a Maine Coon or Norwegian Forest cat, he should weigh between 8 and 12 pounds (3.5 to 5.5 kg). And even Maine Coons and Norwegian Forest Cats rarely weigh more than 20 pounds (9 kg).

Siouxsie: We know that 32 pounds may not sound like a lot to a human being. But let’s put this in perspective.

Thomas: Let’s say you’re a 5-foot, 5-inch (165 cm) woman of average build. A healthy weight range for you would be between 130 and 145 pounds (60 to 66 kg).

Dahlia: Now, imagine this same woman weighing 400 pounds (181 kg). That’s how obese your cat is!

Siouxsie: Morbid obesity is just as dangerous for cats as it is for people. Obesity in cats leads to diabetes, heart disease, high blood pressure, and all the risks of high blood pressure including blindness, strokes, and kidney failure.

Thomas: And the huge stresses all that weight puts on your cat’s body drastically increases his risk of developing arthritis and injuries to the knees and hips.

Dahlia: To remedy your cat’s problems once and for all, you absolutely must get him down to a healthy weight!

Siouxsie: And as with humans, the only way you’re going to be able to make your cat’s weight loss permanent is to change his entire lifestyle. You’ll need to modify his diet (and cut out any snacks and treats you’re giving him) and give him more exercise.

Thomas: If your cat were only a couple of pounds overweight, we’d say you could probably manage this yourself, but because your cat is so drastically obese and obviously unhealthy enough to require vet care for a potentially fatal problem, you’ll need to get your cat a full veterinary workup before you begin.

Dahlia: Your vet will tell you how much exercise your cat can tolerate and give you guidance about how to adjust his diet. It’s very important that you follow your vet’s instructions in order to avoid further injury or aggravation of any underlying health problems such as diabetes or heart disease.

Siouxsie: You and your vet can create a meal and exercise plan that will help your cat lose weight in a gradual, safe and healthy way. Your vet might also suggest you work with a veterinary nutritionist for specialized diet information.

Thomas: This post on The Pet Site has some more information on how to go about helping your cat lose weight. But it also says, just like we said, that your cat absolutely must have a complete physical exam including blood tests and urine tests to rule out underlying diseases.

Dahlia: So, Amanda, once your beautiful big boy recovers from his injury, please talk to your vet and get him started on a weight loss program. If you get him healthy, you’ll be able to enjoy his company for many more years!

Dear Most Esteemed and Knowledgeable Kitties:

My 8-month-old cat has eaten polymer clay a whole half including plastic! Is polymer clay toxic to a cat? How can I keep her from eating clay and all kinds of other non-food stuff including wires, shoe laces, plastic, paint brush tips, junk on the floor, bird food, fish food, paper, potato chips, and crackers? Help!

~ Christina

Siouxsie: Polymer clay is made of polyvinyl chloride (a form of plastic) and phthalates, chemicals designed to make the plastic flexible and workable. Phthalates have been under scrutiny for some time due to concerns about toxicity.

Thomas: However, after a 2002 study by the Vermont Public Interest Research Group made it public that the phthalates used in those clays at the time were potentially toxic, manufacturers started using different and supposedly safer phthalates or non-phthalate plasticizers.

Dahlia: Our research indicated that there’s no need to panic if your pet eats a small amount of the stuff, but “a half” is quite a lot for a small cat. Although we’re pretty sure she’s not going to get poisoned by the stuff, it may block her intestines.

Siouxsie: Watch her litterbox carefully, and you’ll probably see evidence that your (hopefully very bright-colored) clay is coming out. If she doesn’t have a bowel movement for more than a day, give your vet a call, explain what happened, and ask if you should bring her in.

Thomas: As for all the other things your cat is eating — is she actually eating them or just chewing on them? If she’s eating things like shoelaces and wires, this could be very serious, as they could cause her intestines to get twisted up or, in the case of wires, actually puncture her digestive tract.

Dahlia: If she’s chewing on these things, it’s more of a pain in the butt than an actual hazard, except in the case of wires. If she chews through a wire that’s plugged in, she could electrocute herself and/or cause a serious fire hazard.

Siouxsie: The first step to take in curing any chewer is what we call “lead them not into temptation.” That means you need to put anything she chews on or eats in a place she can’t reach it.

Thomas: Keep your potato chips and crackers, paint brushes, fish food and bird food in drawers or cabinets. Keep your floor clean so she doesn’t eat or chew junk. If she tips over the garbage can to get to tasty morsels, invest in a heavier can, preferably with a lid that you operate with a foot pedal.

Dahlia: Wires should be kept neatly organized and tucked away from Kitty’s reach. You can use cable organizers and cable covers for places where wires run along the floors. These products are available at office supply and home supply stores.

Siouxsie: Consider using a bitter anti-chew spray on wires. We’ve heard mixed reviews about how effective these products are, but it can’t hurt to try.

Thomas: The next step is to make her environment more stimulating. Get her some toys. Most cat toys are safe to chew, and you can make them more tempting by rubbing them with, or “marinating” them in high-quality catnip.

Dahlia: When we say “high-quality catnip,” we don’t mean the stuff commonly found in catnip toys at pet stores and supermarkets. We mean go to your health food store and buy catnip in bulk. There are also companies and independent craftspeople that sell toys and more toys and still more toys made with high-quality catnip.

Siouxsie: After you’ve hidden away the things you don’t want your cat to chew and brought in some awesome toys to stimulate her mind, the next step in training is redirection.

Thomas: Redirection is basically distracting your cat with something more fun. To do this, you’ll need to get a few toys that you can use to play with your cat. The old “cat fishing pole” is a great standby. You can buy one or make one yourself with a dowel or twig and some strong twine or string with some rags knotted at the bottom.

Dahlia: Keep your interactive toy with you and whenever you see your cat going for a forbidden chewy thing, pull it out and start playing with her. As soon as she sees that tempting toy, she’ll forget about chewing those wires or shoelaces!

Siouxsie: Be sure to put any string toys away when you’re not using them: Not only is this vital for the “lead them not into temptation” factor, but you’ll avoid the risk that she’ll ingest some part of the toy and get sick.

Thomas: If you’re “crafty,” and from your letter it sounds like you sure are, check out this WikiHow entry on making cat toys for some more inexpensive but really fun and intellectually stimulating cat toys.

Dahlia: Good luck, Christina. Please let us know how things turn out!